In modern times, dating has become more casual, and terms like situationship, nanoship, breadcrumbing, benching, and love bombing have become popular. Dating nowadays is anything but simple; rather, it is a complicated tangle, contrary to what the romantics might wish for. There are a lot of contradictory signals, colors (think about the never-ending discussions around red, green, and beige flags), and chemistry. People frequently chat to or see more than one person at a time because the environment is laid-back and uncommitted. However, dating becomes exclusive when the two people in a relationship agree to only see each other, signifying a transition from a casual relationship to something more deliberate and personal. However, many people are at a loss as to how to initiate the 'Are we exclusive yet?' conversation.

He said, "Prepare yourself for all possibilities; what's the worst that can happen? Your match says they are not on the same page. That doesn't necessarily mean they want to end things." He reminded me that there are so many "what ifs" going through my head about this awful talk. This just means they need a little more time to get there. In addition, this is the time to explain what you expect out of the relationship."

Ravi provided us with a comprehensive manual outlining the causes for our reluctance and providing advice on how to start the dialogue:

Reasons behind the hesitation

• Fear ruining the flow: In today's modern dating, vibes are everything. Everything is going fine- chatting, memes are flowing, your flirting game is on point, humour is off the charts, but then suddenly, ‘What are we?’ conversation comes up. We all fear ruining a good connection with the heavy stuff.
• Fear of rejection: What if you ask if they are ready to go exclusive, and they say it isn't time yet? It gets awkward to the point where ghosting seems like a better option than facing them the next day.
• Paradox of choices: Dating apps are considered the best because they offer plenty of options, but, like all good things, this, too, has its downsides. There's always a whisper of 'What if there's someone better?' It keeps at least 2 out of 8 people from committing to their match at the right time.

How to approach the conversation?

1. Ask yourself a few simple questions

• Do you feel connected to this person? Are you emotionally invested in them? Does this match feel different from others? Are you ready for commitment?
• The motivation behind discussing heavy things like exclusivity matters more than we think. Once you have clarity on that, it will help you understand if the time is right.

2. Strike at the right moment:

• Once the motivation is sorted, the next step is to find the right timing. It can't be within one week of chatting, nor can you wait till your six-month anniversary.
• Follow this thumb rule: once you have been consistently dating for over a month, combined with mutual feelings, or at least when the energy feels reciprocal. For instance, you have shared socials and phone numbers and already discussed family problems; it means you are halfway there. Just shoot the question and see where it goes.

3. Casual but clear intention:

• When you finally discuss the matter, the tone cannot be either too serious or too dramatic, nor can it be extra casual. Just bring it up the way you'd ask if they think 'veg biriyani should be considered real biriyani or not.' 
• Create a fun curiosity instead of pressure. Begin with a positive comment on the connection, like, "I really enjoy getting to know you. Can't believe we've been chatting for almost 2 months now." And only then bring up the topic with something like, "It feels like the right time to discuss where this is going," instead of directly asking, "So, where do you think this is going?" 
• The goal is to open the floor for a discussion and not make it sound like an ultimatum.

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